And So it began

"ONCE UPON A TIME"....there came along this little lump...insignificant really when you compare it to the entire world of lumps. That is, right up to the point that it wasn't...insignificant I mean............... and so began my journey.

A NEWER SHADE OF I more then SURVIVE...I am learning to THRIVE...

OF COURSE... we all know things are bound to get a little crazy with a surprise around most every corner...not to mention an assortment of bumps and bruises along the way...but I am ever thankful for them all...they have all made me who I am. So buckle up, hold on tight and enjoy the ride thru what I lovingly refer to as LIFE

Saturday, August 8, 2015

I have to say....without the big day-to-day cancer experiences to share....I have spent a lot of time pondering the merits of keeping this blog going.  I wondered what...if anything I would have to say without this turning in to that (let's just be honest for a second) pointless & dreaded over-share evil we call... 
Ain't nobody got time for all that crazy!!!

Then as I pondered long and hard about it I decided (mostly selfish) that even if no one else needed this....I STILL DID.  It has blessed my life with the great gift of looking at my life and taking the time to sit back and ponder...just being more self-aware.  It is very therapeutic/cathartic for me to put my mutterings onto "paper" can be a smidge unnerving if I stop & think about the fact that other people take the time to read it....OYE! 
(Shameless plug time.....please take a second & 
"follow by email"
the little box on the right side under my tree...
just curious if there is life out there...okay I'm done) 
I have not filtered or edited my word & thoughts to be true to myself and the purpose I began this blog in the first place....why start now?? My intent has always been to be open, honest and transparent on these pages....hoping/knowing that my random mutterings may be just what someone needs at some moment in their life. 

 I started 3 years ago with a hope and desire to help someone make it thru this...a place where we both (all) can heal.  I have always felt....known if I honestly follow the impression to write, I am prompted to know what to write. The words flow and the post just pours out and it all falls into place but when I strike out on my own or go off on a tangent, I struggle and can spend hours just trying to clean up the mess of singular scattered thoughts. These are always very frustrating and off putting time for me & the reason for most of the long gaps in the past year.  The minute I begin to think that I know best....the "airwaves" go silent and it becomes a VERY daunting task so I just walk away.  I find that its usually the time I start living in the short term....I begin to feel over involved/stressed/pre-occupied with the stupid little day to day stuff that is brought on by walking around with spiritual blinders on.  I feel rushed but stagnant....focused but scattered....still but frantic....accomplished but fruitless... as my mom used to say "More hurry less haste"....the faster and harder you try...the less you get done. Then softly the blinders come off and I feel the sweet whisperings of the spirit. The thoughts begin to pop into my mind and moments of pondering begin to happen again and I am looking for my note book to jot it down before I forget it and the sweet moment  of inspiration is lost ....those are the times when I begin to feel most at the world has returned to it's proper axis...then I sit back and realize once again that I DON"T KNOW BEST...and I humbly hand the reins of my life back over to the Master....He who ALWAYS knows best