And So it began

"ONCE UPON A TIME"....there came along this little lump...insignificant really when you compare it to the entire world of lumps. That is, right up to the point that it wasn't...insignificant I mean............... and so began my journey.

A NEWER SHADE OF I more then SURVIVE...I am learning to THRIVE...

OF COURSE... we all know things are bound to get a little crazy with a surprise around most every corner...not to mention an assortment of bumps and bruises along the way...but I am ever thankful for them all...they have all made me who I am. So buckle up, hold on tight and enjoy the ride thru what I lovingly refer to as LIFE

Thursday, October 18, 2012

     So I was so proud of myself.  VoR went into work and I ventured off for the pre-chemo blood work with the understanding that I would find a quiet corner to sit and read a book and wait the 90 minutes for the blood report to come back before we started chemo (yes...VoR will be here for chemo).  All seemed to be picture perfect for me....I had slept REALLY good last night 8+ hours and had eaten some breakfast....even showered (much more of a production then normal) no nerves or anxiety and no is grand.
     Now this is ME we are talking about!!!  I have come to discover over my life that I am that "1%" that stuff happens to....reactions to meds, extra roots in my teeth, problems with my PICC line, etc.  So today was gonna be one of those 1% days.  I calmly saunter into the chemo unit expecting things to be normal.....I guess someone forgot to tell my poor picc that.  AARGGG!!!  Soooo...when the nurse doing my blood work looked at it, she realized that it was WAY too far out and so the chemo had a chance of not being sent where it should be (by my heart) but sent up my vein to my brain....SUPER NOT GOOD!!!  They made the decision to just give me chemo thru a traditional IV and then pull the picc out then schedule me to have it re-inserted before next cycle in 2 weeks.  Not my best reaction I must admit.....I had left my "big girl panties" at home and so faced with the only IV option....I crumbled and cried.  I felt like I had just what I wasn't sure, since PICC issues really had nothing to do with me but somehow it was still my fault....worse yet....fobia #2...NEEDLES!!!  The girls (nurses) were exceptional with me.....they felt as bad as I did over the entire debacle that this has turned into.  So I had 90 mins to find a quiet corner to have a good cry and say a pray...or 2, pull out my scriptures and try to retrieve my once mastered control.....and wouldn't you know took 2 tries to get the IV in and running well enough.  The nurese felt really bad and she did really good especially under the HUGE heap of pressure my stress level added to her.  I am so blessed to be where I am with the care and the staff that I have.
     The silver lining of this latest cloud is FOR ability to have a great deep soak in my tub in a couple of days (every day) until they put the new PICC in.....and trust me...that is a HUGE !!!